I love, love the Steelers. But, those football fanatics among my friends and family have spent all weekend talking about Kurt Warner. Why, why, why????
So, I decided to find out. Go read this! Stop whatever you are doing and read it! Right now!!
Enjoy the big game! Eat junk food so I may live vicariously through you! Remember your favorite commercials so we can talk about them Monday!
(Totally off the subject: Do you remember those very silly "talking stain" ads from Tide that started during last year's Superbowl? Well, during that ad campaign (and my addiction to sweepstakes and contests), I won a Tide t-shirt and stain pen! The t-shirt said "Loads of Hope," because they helped gulf coast residents with laundry during Katrina clean-up. Isn't that a great saying... this year too? Loads of hope.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Friday, January 30, 2009
Losing Vision
I met a woman today who is losing her vision.
Literally. She is becoming blind.
And harder than the not seeing, for her, is the fact that she once could see. It's a loss of what once was.
"It would have been easier to have been born blind, than to realize what I've lost."
The loss, the act of losing... who has the strength for it?
Her other struggle was that she no longer had any pretenses of being independent. She now needed help, often, and for everything. And so do we. There is nothing we can do on our own. There are no independent people. We need help.
I have so many cliches today: "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." I have always wondered if this were really true. I have yet to decide.
And, though not a cliche, I am also thinking of Amazing Grace: "Was Blind, But Now I See."
Go see this movie. It is life changing.
Literally. She is becoming blind.
And harder than the not seeing, for her, is the fact that she once could see. It's a loss of what once was.
"It would have been easier to have been born blind, than to realize what I've lost."
The loss, the act of losing... who has the strength for it?
Her other struggle was that she no longer had any pretenses of being independent. She now needed help, often, and for everything. And so do we. There is nothing we can do on our own. There are no independent people. We need help.
I have so many cliches today: "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." I have always wondered if this were really true. I have yet to decide.
And, though not a cliche, I am also thinking of Amazing Grace: "Was Blind, But Now I See."
Go see this movie. It is life changing.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Unmet Longings
Monday is the day for other writers, but this one couldn't wait!
"Unmet Longings" by John Eldredge from Walking With God.
...
What do we then do with these longings and desires that go unmet? I mean, they keep presenting themselves in one way or another.
I think what I do is simply bury them (and I see others do it too). On one hand, of course we do. It feels like we have to. You cannot live your life with a constant awareness of heightened desires that are unmet, just as you can't go through your day continually pining for a life you do not have. You have to live the life you do have. But I find that from time to time God comes and actually stirs our longings and desires, awakens them. You see someone and think, What would life be like with her (or him)? Over dinner one night someone tells you how much he loves his job, and you think, Maybe it's time for a change. I always did want to ________ (fill in the blank). Be a writer. An architect.
Why does God do this? Wouldn't it be better to let sleeping dogs lie?
No. To bury the deep longings of our hearts is not a good thing. Doing so begins to shut our hearts down, and then we fall into that "get on with life" mentality. For me, that means bearing down and working. Getting things done. But my passion slowly fades away, and life recedes from me. I cannot bring to my work the zest I once did, so even my work suffers. Because my heart is suffering. It's like a form of slow starvation...
The heart is like that. Thank God, we cannot force it down forever. Hurting, it begins to insist on some attention. Now, we can either listen to those rumblings and let our hearts surface so that we bring them to God, or we can give in to some addiction. The starving heart won't be ignored forever. Some promise of life comes along and BOOM - we find ourselves in the kitchen closet taking down a quart of ice cream or cruising the Internet for some intimacy.
God knows the danger of ignoring our hearts, and so he reawakens desire. You see a photo in a magazine, and pause, and sigh. You see someone with a life that reminds you of the life you once thought you would live. You're channel surfing and see someone doing the very thing you always dreamed you would do - the runner breaking the tape, the woman enjoying herself immensely as she teaches her cooking class. Sometimes all it takes is seeing someone enjoying themselves doing anything, and your heart says, I want that too.
...
More often than not, this awakening of desire is an invitation from God to seek what we've given up as lost, an invitation to try again. ... It's so easy to reach those plateaus where we decide, This is good enough. It could be better, but it could be worse too. To get to the better will take work, and risk, and I'm fine with things the way they are. God comes along and says, Don't give up.
I'm stunned by this whole reawakening process. The willingness and what feels like such a risk for God to reawaken desire in me. I mean, geez - to feel again a desire I've long buried. Yikes. I might make a wrong move, come to the wrong conclusion, just as our friend might have decided that what she really needed was a different spouse.
Something I read years ago by C.S. Lewis in the Weight of Glory has proven helpful to me time and time again, and may rescue us in the very moment of awakened desire I am describing. Lewis is trying to show us that what God uses to awaken desire is not necessarily what we long for. The things "in which we thought the beauty was located will betray us if we trust them; it was not IN them, it only came THROUGH them, and what came through them was longing. These things...are good images of what we desire; but if they are mistaken for the thing itself, they turn into dumb idols, breaking the hearts of the worshippers. For they are not the thing itself." They are not what we are longing for.
It is not that specific man or woman we desire, but what they point to, what is coming through them.... When a desire is awakened, by whatever source, the thing to pray is God, what do you have for me?
I think many of us who do long for a holy life have chosen the way of "kill desire," because at the time it seems there is no other way. And sometimes in the moment, this may well be our only choice. Certainly it is better to push away some longing if we know that yielding to it means giving way to temptation. But this is not the best way to holiness in the long run, for the starving heart will eventually seek some relief.
But there are many desires that we know cannot be met now. It may be too late to become a professional baseball player or musician, or too late to have a child. This is the real danger zone because it seems like there is no other choice but to put away this part of your heart. But to send your heart into exile because your longings have no hope of being met is also to exile your heart from the love of God. And he would have your whole heart. It's hard to tell whether God is arousing some desire so that you may seek a new life or simply so that this part of your heart may be made whole in him. But whatever else may be the case, you have to begin by giving this part of your heart back to God. Above all else, your heart must find a safe home in him.
"Unmet Longings" by John Eldredge from Walking With God.
...
What do we then do with these longings and desires that go unmet? I mean, they keep presenting themselves in one way or another.
I think what I do is simply bury them (and I see others do it too). On one hand, of course we do. It feels like we have to. You cannot live your life with a constant awareness of heightened desires that are unmet, just as you can't go through your day continually pining for a life you do not have. You have to live the life you do have. But I find that from time to time God comes and actually stirs our longings and desires, awakens them. You see someone and think, What would life be like with her (or him)? Over dinner one night someone tells you how much he loves his job, and you think, Maybe it's time for a change. I always did want to ________ (fill in the blank). Be a writer. An architect.
Why does God do this? Wouldn't it be better to let sleeping dogs lie?
No. To bury the deep longings of our hearts is not a good thing. Doing so begins to shut our hearts down, and then we fall into that "get on with life" mentality. For me, that means bearing down and working. Getting things done. But my passion slowly fades away, and life recedes from me. I cannot bring to my work the zest I once did, so even my work suffers. Because my heart is suffering. It's like a form of slow starvation...
The heart is like that. Thank God, we cannot force it down forever. Hurting, it begins to insist on some attention. Now, we can either listen to those rumblings and let our hearts surface so that we bring them to God, or we can give in to some addiction. The starving heart won't be ignored forever. Some promise of life comes along and BOOM - we find ourselves in the kitchen closet taking down a quart of ice cream or cruising the Internet for some intimacy.
God knows the danger of ignoring our hearts, and so he reawakens desire. You see a photo in a magazine, and pause, and sigh. You see someone with a life that reminds you of the life you once thought you would live. You're channel surfing and see someone doing the very thing you always dreamed you would do - the runner breaking the tape, the woman enjoying herself immensely as she teaches her cooking class. Sometimes all it takes is seeing someone enjoying themselves doing anything, and your heart says, I want that too.
...
More often than not, this awakening of desire is an invitation from God to seek what we've given up as lost, an invitation to try again. ... It's so easy to reach those plateaus where we decide, This is good enough. It could be better, but it could be worse too. To get to the better will take work, and risk, and I'm fine with things the way they are. God comes along and says, Don't give up.
I'm stunned by this whole reawakening process. The willingness and what feels like such a risk for God to reawaken desire in me. I mean, geez - to feel again a desire I've long buried. Yikes. I might make a wrong move, come to the wrong conclusion, just as our friend might have decided that what she really needed was a different spouse.
Something I read years ago by C.S. Lewis in the Weight of Glory has proven helpful to me time and time again, and may rescue us in the very moment of awakened desire I am describing. Lewis is trying to show us that what God uses to awaken desire is not necessarily what we long for. The things "in which we thought the beauty was located will betray us if we trust them; it was not IN them, it only came THROUGH them, and what came through them was longing. These things...are good images of what we desire; but if they are mistaken for the thing itself, they turn into dumb idols, breaking the hearts of the worshippers. For they are not the thing itself." They are not what we are longing for.
It is not that specific man or woman we desire, but what they point to, what is coming through them.... When a desire is awakened, by whatever source, the thing to pray is God, what do you have for me?
I think many of us who do long for a holy life have chosen the way of "kill desire," because at the time it seems there is no other way. And sometimes in the moment, this may well be our only choice. Certainly it is better to push away some longing if we know that yielding to it means giving way to temptation. But this is not the best way to holiness in the long run, for the starving heart will eventually seek some relief.
But there are many desires that we know cannot be met now. It may be too late to become a professional baseball player or musician, or too late to have a child. This is the real danger zone because it seems like there is no other choice but to put away this part of your heart. But to send your heart into exile because your longings have no hope of being met is also to exile your heart from the love of God. And he would have your whole heart. It's hard to tell whether God is arousing some desire so that you may seek a new life or simply so that this part of your heart may be made whole in him. But whatever else may be the case, you have to begin by giving this part of your heart back to God. Above all else, your heart must find a safe home in him.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Pocket Notebook
Most writing instructors, myself included, tell students to carry around a pocket notebook. This is just a tiny journal, carried everywhere, in which you write everything. Bits of conversation, ideas, lyrics, funny happenings: all are fodder for future work.
I've been doing this for as long as I can remember. Often, I buy gigantic bags, just so I have room for a full size spiral notebook. I don't have other (normal) girls' baggage; I have chapstick and pens and paper.
The silly story your waitress told you? That would make a perfect short story. The fight you overheard next to your office? That could be turned into a fight between the characters in your novel. When strangers began talking while in line for coffee? If strangers are talking about a topic, surely it is a timely title for a magazine article!
And, it's a bit of a cliche, but google "shopping lists as poetry," and you'll have your reading material for a bit.
So, without further ado, here are random quotes, notes, and sermon topics that have landed in my notebook. Since I have the memory of an amoeba, you'll just have to imagine where they came from, because I have no idea.
The ripple effect of his leaving would be incalcuable.
Quiet In My Town - song title
Don't respond to emotion with logic. Respond to emotion with emotion!
Mistakes are inevitable. She just can't go jumping into really big, obnoxious, obvious ones.
That was all just random casual conversation, right?
anxiety-aholic
In every work, there is a part for God to do, and a part for us to do. He won't do ours, and we can't do his!
Well, happy birthday to me.
And, my personal favorite: He was just a giant trash can full of poop.
I've been doing this for as long as I can remember. Often, I buy gigantic bags, just so I have room for a full size spiral notebook. I don't have other (normal) girls' baggage; I have chapstick and pens and paper.
The silly story your waitress told you? That would make a perfect short story. The fight you overheard next to your office? That could be turned into a fight between the characters in your novel. When strangers began talking while in line for coffee? If strangers are talking about a topic, surely it is a timely title for a magazine article!
And, it's a bit of a cliche, but google "shopping lists as poetry," and you'll have your reading material for a bit.
So, without further ado, here are random quotes, notes, and sermon topics that have landed in my notebook. Since I have the memory of an amoeba, you'll just have to imagine where they came from, because I have no idea.
The ripple effect of his leaving would be incalcuable.
Quiet In My Town - song title
Don't respond to emotion with logic. Respond to emotion with emotion!
Mistakes are inevitable. She just can't go jumping into really big, obnoxious, obvious ones.
That was all just random casual conversation, right?
anxiety-aholic
In every work, there is a part for God to do, and a part for us to do. He won't do ours, and we can't do his!
Well, happy birthday to me.
And, my personal favorite: He was just a giant trash can full of poop.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Distractions and Sorry Excuses
Things That Distract Me From Writing:
Facebook. I've said it before. I will say it again. It is a really big deal in my world.
My children. I love them. Truly. But, occasionally, they still feel the need to eat.
Dishes. Why are these never done? Wwwwhhhhyyyyy????
YouTube. Have you seen the one with the talking dog? Or the music video that you vaguely remember liking, but still need to see RIGHT NOW? Or the hilarious failed American Idol auditions? Or this one? (Watch the guy in the middle. It takes a minute to be funny, but it is totally worth your time.)
Hulu. Free movies online!! It's so close to working (I'm working! I'm at the computer!), yet so far away.
Writing websites. Who am I kidding? I'm not learning much. I'm just procrastinating.
The Simpsons. It's on everyday, people. Every Single Day.
OK. That's all I can admit, and still show my face in public.
What distracts you from your work / life ?
Facebook. I've said it before. I will say it again. It is a really big deal in my world.
My children. I love them. Truly. But, occasionally, they still feel the need to eat.
Dishes. Why are these never done? Wwwwhhhhyyyyy????
YouTube. Have you seen the one with the talking dog? Or the music video that you vaguely remember liking, but still need to see RIGHT NOW? Or the hilarious failed American Idol auditions? Or this one? (Watch the guy in the middle. It takes a minute to be funny, but it is totally worth your time.)
Hulu. Free movies online!! It's so close to working (I'm working! I'm at the computer!), yet so far away.
Writing websites. Who am I kidding? I'm not learning much. I'm just procrastinating.
The Simpsons. It's on everyday, people. Every Single Day.
OK. That's all I can admit, and still show my face in public.
What distracts you from your work / life ?
Saturday, January 24, 2009
V-Day
I know this is, like, super early, but I want to know about Saint Valentine's Day!!
Do you do anything? Go out? Special dinner? Roses and chocolate?
Glare at your co-worker's constant onslaught of teddy bears and balloons and secretly think terrible things about her boyfriend's useless commercial displays of affection?
Tell me what you like, what you usually do, who you spend it with!!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Whopper Sacrifice
This story includes all of my favorite things. Facebook, burgers, and free stuff!
Burger King rules the advertising world. Who else could make such annoying commercials, the kind of annoying that is not change-the-channel or fast-forward-the-TiVo buzzing, but annoying enough to recount to your friends because of their sheer atrociousness?
But how much do you really value these friends you complain to? Would you be willing to sacrifice ten of your friends for a Whopper?
Burger King's latest stunt was a Facebook app that let you "give" them ten of your friends in exchange for free fast food. Facebook took away the app, citing privacy violations. Now, BK is getting free press for being booted off the web. Genius, no?
There are a few Facebook "friends" I haven't seen since high school and haven't spoken to since accepting their friend request. I suspect these people are chronic befrienders - just trying to get over that 400 mark.
But I love my closest Facebook friends. Don't I? All couple hundred of them?
Would you give up ten friends for a Whopper?
(Jami - would you give up ten friends for a Boca Burger?)
Thursday, January 15, 2009
A few days back, Anne and May asked, "Who are five people, alive today, who you would like to meet?"
What a great question! Taking out dead people really eliminates a lot of... um... dead weight in this kind of question. How to narrow it down?
I would pick Lauren Winner so I could ask about writing. And Jesus. And because I still want to be her when I grow up.
Then Barack Obama because who doesn't want to meet the president?
And Condoleezza Rice because I want to ask her about music, and Soviet history (she studied with Madeline Albright's dad!!), AMBITION, football and politics! Yeah, I want to be her too.
Next would be Steven Colbert.
And... I just get one more??? Colin Firth, to see if I could get through a conversation without drooling. I think I could manage.
Who would you meet? (Five / Alive)
What a great question! Taking out dead people really eliminates a lot of... um... dead weight in this kind of question. How to narrow it down?
I would pick Lauren Winner so I could ask about writing. And Jesus. And because I still want to be her when I grow up.
Then Barack Obama because who doesn't want to meet the president?
And Condoleezza Rice because I want to ask her about music, and Soviet history (she studied with Madeline Albright's dad!!), AMBITION, football and politics! Yeah, I want to be her too.
Next would be Steven Colbert.
And... I just get one more??? Colin Firth, to see if I could get through a conversation without drooling. I think I could manage.
Who would you meet? (Five / Alive)
Monday, January 12, 2009
Nice Girls Don't Change the World
Nice Girls Don't Change the World, but this book certainly changed mine! Lynne Hybels is a genius and an (actual) God-send.I am so tired of being NICE! I have been fake-nice for much longer than I care to admit. (My whole life?? There. I admitted it.)
If you have been nice, for all the wrong reasons, this book is the cure.
Here's just one life-changing quote:
"But whenever my involvement in ministry seemed to inconvenience Bill or the kids, or in any way kept me from living up to other people's expectations - which it always did - then I withdrew, backed out, quit. When I felt frustrated, or even angry, about having to do that, I confessed my sin, my selfishness, my demanding spirit.
I thought it was the right thing to do. I thought denying my gifts and passions was part of what it meant to "die to self," as scripture requires. I didn't realize there was a difference between dying to self-will and dying to the self God created me to be."
Is real the opposite of nice?
Friday, January 9, 2009
I have gotten a few, "Who ARE you?" 's this year.
Am I too old to keep saying, "I don't know?"
I DO feel like a different person.
It feels pretty sudden. It couldn't have been that sudden, right? Change takes time. But over the course of a year, everything has changed.
How I spend my free time.
My job.
My exercise routine. (I got one!)
My hobbies.
My music.
My worldview.
For the first time of my adult life, my housing situation didn't change during the year. Maybe staying put allowed my brain to wander?
And, I must say, it feels good! Terrifying, but good.
Do you embrace change? Or do you run away screaming, hands over eyes, hoping it all goes away soon?
Am I too old to keep saying, "I don't know?"
I DO feel like a different person.
It feels pretty sudden. It couldn't have been that sudden, right? Change takes time. But over the course of a year, everything has changed.
How I spend my free time.
My job.
My exercise routine. (I got one!)
My hobbies.
My music.
My worldview.
For the first time of my adult life, my housing situation didn't change during the year. Maybe staying put allowed my brain to wander?
And, I must say, it feels good! Terrifying, but good.
Do you embrace change? Or do you run away screaming, hands over eyes, hoping it all goes away soon?
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Trust Fund Babies
aka, Trustafarians, have a life I envy.
I wish I could waste every day, with zero responsibilities.
Or maybe not. How long would it take to be sick of it? Bored out of your mind?
I would be willing to find out!
And here is my favorite trust fund baby. About A Boy is still (always) in my movie top ten list.
I wish I could waste every day, with zero responsibilities.
Or maybe not. How long would it take to be sick of it? Bored out of your mind?
I would be willing to find out!
And here is my favorite trust fund baby. About A Boy is still (always) in my movie top ten list.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Sugar Free!
So, I stopped eating sugar.
Day SEVEN and counting. I am aiming for three months.
Why, you ask?
First, there is the fabulous, magical weight loss that happens with a sugar free existence. I was living on cake the week before Christmas. (Teachers understand the phenomenon of the baked good avalanche that happens every year!)
Second, I have a lot of weird health issues that all are aggravated by sugar consumption. I won't bore you with the tact-free laundry list of problems, but you get the idea. Honestly, I should have stopped a long time ago.
Third, it made my brain fuzzy! I feel like I have been asleep for the last four years, and suddenly am very, very AWAKE!!! Good Morning!!
Fourth, it was wrecking my running. I kept having sugar crashes, and didn't have energy to function. Trying to run through a sugar crash was impossible!
Fifth, it was an addiction. It was many times a day. It was at every meal. It was all day long.
Despite all these really, really great reasons for giving it up, I MISS IT!!!! There are M&M's here. There are cookies here. There are Hershey's Miniatures here.
Do you understand the kind of will power this is taking??
Have you ever given up something you missed? Did you win the battle? Lose the war?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)