This Week With Bethany's Freelance Life...

This week with Bethany's Freelance Life, (said with my best George Stephanopoulos voice), I'll be sleeping. Yes, that's right, sleeping.

MY FIRST MARATHON IS IN FIVE DAYS. *please ignore panic attack*

You know what I didn't understand about marathon training?

I didn't understand how much I would have to give up.

I didn't understand that I couldn't go out with my girlfriends on Friday nights because I had a long run at 5:00AM the next day. I didn't understand that my body would need ten hours of sleep (instead of my normal five.) I didn't understand how my house would suffer, my writing would suffer, my social life would suffer. I didn't understand I would have to say, "No," to many fun and good things because I. Just. Couldn't.

No matter if I ever do this again, I learned something I plan on bringing over to my writing career.

Giving up.

I am going to lose some quality TV time. My Twitter account is going to suffer. I may go back to five hours of sleep, just to fit in face time in front of this screen.

If I want to reach this goal of finishing this book, I HAVE TO GIVE UP. I can't raise these children, teach these big children, have a path through the living room, finish writing a book, and watch every Glee episode. Something (ahem) has to get dropped.

Check back Thursday for Three Things Thursday.

Monday morning, I go back to being a normal writer who runs three miles for fun just like ALL YA'LLS DOCTORS say to. Seriously. I mean it. Go run. (Just don't get carried away like I did.)

See you Thursday.

WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP?

Three Things Thursday

NEW THING!

I want to hear three things.

Are you: Recently thinking? Feeling thankful? Becoming thin? Always thirsty? Needing therapy?

Name three things. Make it random, make it silly, make it confessional, make it up, make it real.

Here's mine:

1. After a decade of tears, Dave Ramsey, late fees and bounced checks, we have lived on a budget for exactly two weeks. TWO WHOLE WEEKS OF AGREEMENT. This is big, people.

2. My writing career, as far as I can see the into future, is always going to include teaching the craft of writing. I love it. LOVE IT.

3. I took off my anti-stalker / stalker thing because I checked it every twenty minutes. Thanks for reading! I love you. I was a crazy person. I feel a thousand pounds lighter. What am I going to do with all the free time?

Me Too! A Confession

I suffer from Me-Too-itis. If you have a concern, a belief, a favorite fill-in-the-blank, chances are, I will, "too."

It doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter if it is true or good. I just happen to agree. With EVERYONE.

Yesterday, I noticed someone's Facebook status-thing-a-ma-jiggy said, "Atheist." What was my first thought? "Yeah, I'm with ya."

Anyone who has known me for more than ten minutes know I'm not an atheist. When I'm mad at God, when I hate God, when I think we've got it all wrong about who He really is, even when I am ready to throw it all away, I don't doubt He's up there.

I don't doubt He's down here.

For that brief second, though, I was ready to agree with a near-stranger who I haven't talked to in a decade.

What is WRONG with me?

I have listened to your music, followed your hobbies, read your books, watched your teevee shows, bought your movies, thumbed through your magazines.

Most of these things aren't necessarily, "bad." They are just a symptom of something...um... pathetic.

I am too old for peer pressure.

Do you agree with everyone? Do you hear a different drummer?

Hey, Hey, Hey!

According to Danielle's blog, the marathon is 16 days away! Yikes! Honestly, I'm sooooo ready to have it over with! The tapering (resting up) is underway. I must admit this is my favorite part of marathon training. (Lazy much?)

Anywho, after the crazy racing (5 1/2 hours will not be much of a "race," but whatevs), I'll be back to blogging.

What would you like to see?

More writing?

More running?

More books?

More, "My, how fantastic are YOU?"

More confessions?

More... whining because I don't live in NYC, but am really content... really. I mean it. Content.?

This is your chance to get a tailor-made blog! Readddyyyy...Go!

Top Ten Ways You Are Awesome

Here's what I love (deal with it) about you:

1. You read the blog. My blog! Really, it's the first step to all good things.

2. You are forgiven.

3. You are a saint, holy and beloved.

4. You are loved, since the dawn of time, loved.

5. You are the only one of you.

6. You are a child of the King!

7. You, even when you are messy and broken, are made in the image of the everlasting God.

8. The fact that you ARE messy and broken, means I am a little glad I'm not alone in my messes. So, uh, thanks for being so screwed up sometimes.

9. You are not alone.

10. You change every single thing. You show me how to escape my very narrow view of my very narrow world. You open my eyes, show me what compassion means, wake me up. You are very different from me, and that is all kinds of awesome.

How else are you awesome? Count the ways...

High Culture and Fancy Book Learnin'

Yesterday, the fam spent (nay, invested!) a day at Woodruff Arts Center in Atlanta. We had a few hours at the High Museum of Art, studying da Vinci and Monet. We heard the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra.

I've spent nearly every waking hour this week thinking about the arts. And then! After all those thoughts of creating and learning and growing and doing, the day was exactly what I needed. It was family day, but I'm pretty sure I enjoyed it more than the kids did.

I'm not gonna lie. It was not perfect. It's difficult keeping two-year-old climbers off 18th century chairs. Also, during Grieg's "Morning Mood," the big kid yelled, "Hey!! Mom! This is that song from Little Einsteins!"

THE ARTS are such a big part of who I am. They're my career, my hobby, and my community. My people. I have failed in sharing this with my children and yesterday was a big step in the right direction.

I am learning to love Mayberry, but this day, my favorite day, was a city fix in the best sense. Today, I am content.

i thank you God for most this amazing...

i thank You God for most this amazing
day: for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun's birthday; this is the birth
day of life and love and wings: and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any--lifted from the no
of all nothing--human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)

ee cummings

Today

Stolen from Keri. Thanks, Keri! I really like it when she does these. Also, Marcie yelled at me to write something, so this one's for the girls.

Outside My Window...
I hear a train. A dog. It's misty and fall and two-thirty in the morning and I feel like I'm the only one in the whole world who is still awake.

I am thinking...
Oh so much. Too much. I think I've spent a lot of years being angry at God for things that may or may not have been His fault, and I'm having a hard time a) being angry (because angry is bad, yo), b) redirecting the anger toward somebody who deserves it, and c) figuring out why I'm mad to begin with. It's a vicious cycle of crazy.

I am thankful for...
You.

From the kitchen...
Today was dollar sushi day, so my kitchen is blissfully free of dishes. This morning, though, there was coffee and bacon and blueberry pancakes.

I am wearing...
HA! If I remembered this question was here, I would have skipped this exercise. I'm wearing an outfit I won't ever let anybody see. If I was dying, I would change first. I'm wearing fuzzy slippers, yoga pants, New York t-shirt, and hoodie. It looks much worse than it sounds. That's saying something.

I am creating...
Crushed spirits via the student papers I'm grading.

I am going...
nowhere. *sigh*

I am reading...
papers mentioned above.

I am hoping...
that I don't die in this marathon.

I am hearing...
click, click, click of the keyboard.

Around the house...
socks. shoes. toys. Somebody better tell these kids... oh, wait. All this stuff is mine.

One of my favorite things...
is chai. It's fall. Actually, fall is one of my favorite things.

A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week...
Find sleep. Do class work before the rooster crows. Play dates. Run. Run some more. Babysit the best baby ever. Birthdays.

Random

Hey! Long time no talk. I'm running out the door, but I wanted to let you know about the new blog on the List O' Blogs. Her name is Sarah Markley. Click over. Read her story. It's a great story.

Let's catch up soon!

Oh! Before I go, have you seen this? Isn't this just the best?

Class V Whitewater and Pictures to Prove It

Welcome to our West Virginia, whitewater rafting, camping vacation! Hold the banjo jokes, please.

First of all, (I should just get this out of the way), the whole thing was amazing. A.MA.ZING. We went to the Gauley River. Google it. Well, here, I did it for you. It's big. Like, Class V, people die here, big.

I think it's time the blogging buddies met the BETTER HALF! This is Jamie. Fuzzy-Jamie, in this picture. Cute, ain't he?

This is our friend, Stephen. "He is our guide and friend." Sorry, couldn't resist. But, really, he is our guide. And, um, friend.

This is my, "I might die soon, but I will still smile for your camera," smile. In front of me is Other Stephen, AKA Bach, sounds like, "batch." Jamie is the red helmet. Behind Jamie is Dawn, Guide Stephen's girlfriend.

This is Pillow Rock. See that kayak on the right? There is another kayak beside him. (UPRIGHT! UNDER WATER!) It's big.

We are scouting the rapid before we run it. Hey! Can you guess who fell out of the raft?

Finally, at river's end...Whew! Still alive.

Then the five of us did normal weekend things, like... picked up a hitchhiker, went for a drive with three Italian Greyhounds, and had a little party with Sol Driven Train.

(This vacation was brought to you by the local family babysitters, who can never be thanked enough.)

Dear Wal-Mart,

Dear Wal-Mart,

Thank you for the "locally-grown produce." If ever an organization could jump on a bandwagon three years too late, you are it.

I am enjoying the apples. They are delicious.

Also, these "locally-grown" apples are from a farm in Michigan. Wal-Mart: I do not live in Michigan. I do not live CLOSE to Michigan.

So... locally... once? When the apples were in Michigan, they were local produce? Does "local" now mean, "Western Hemisphere?"

Perhaps "local" means, "not grown in outer space."

Wal-Mart, thank you for the locally-grown produce from Planet Earth.

Mumus Happen

So, I was getting ready for WORK (have I mentioned that I ENJOY WORK?! I ENJOY WORK!!), and I yet to choose the shoes.


"Pointy-toed-Stacy-Loundon-approved-patent-leather or the comfortable?" I asked the fashionista of the family.


"Definitely comfortable. Because, really? Who you trying to impress?"


Are you sensing where this is going?

I admit it. I was shamed into comfort.


Thaaaaaat's how it starts, Internet. Next year, I will be wearing these.
Mumus happen, people. Mumus happen.

Our Own Smallness

"Suddenly summoned to witness something great and horrendous, we keep fighting not to reduce it to our own smallness." - John Updike

On September 11, we ask, "Where were you?" We want to know how you heard the news, spent the day, how it changed you. We want to know if you were on a plane, or almost on a plane, or in a mid-American city, dreading the western expansion of terror.

We make it about ourselves, because that's all we have. We didn't know anyone, not really. All we can answer for is ourselves.

Want to know what it changed for me? It surprised me who I wanted to talk to. No, I was surprised at who I needed to know was still well, still alive.

I called my family; my friends; my uncle, the pilot; my aunt, retired from the Pentagon.

But all I could think about was the missing friends. I thought of those I couldn't call... the lost numbers, the missing letters... I thought of how careless I had been to lose those people.

It clarified all my life.

For one brief hour, in my heart of hearts, I was sure of who I loved.

Brave-Ity

The big kid: "I'm really good at bullfighting. But... I can't REALLY do it 'till I'm bigger. I practice with Lamby, but he doesn't move.

I need to practice with something that moves."